Dear Friends & Family, It's true. I chose this life and everything that has accompanied it since. I chose to parents kids who require extra time to celebrate their culture. Attend cultural events. Cook new foods, and continually educate myself on a culture not my own. I chose to have children who come with another extended family of their own. I chose to ... Read More
Navigating Back to School: Through the Adoption and Foster Care Lens
The new school year is almost upon us, and for many of us, it may have already begun. It marks the return to reality and for so many of our kids (and ourselves) a wave of emotions begins to arise at the thought of returning. Some of you may be ready to celebrate the return to quieter days, and others may feel sadness at the thought of summer coming to an end. Whether we have ... Read More
Local Adoption or International Adoption: Which One is Right?
The great adoption debate: Should you adopt locally or overseas (and if you're not sure about adoption in general, find out if adoption is wrong here)? The judgment of others is readily available when you decide to move forward with adoption, as everyone comes forward with opinions about where you should adopt from. It is ironic, however, that 99% of the time these opinions are ... Read More
12 Things You Shouldn’t Say to Adoptive or Foster Parents
It was a beautiful evening as my best friend and I sat in our vehicle, parked along the river, ready to go for a leisurely stroll (so weird I use to do things leisurely!). We were mid conversation, when a man who looked to be in his mid-fifties walked up to my vehicle and knocked on the window. Thinking he wanted directions, I rolled the window down. Now for clarification, we ... Read More
I’m Dying: Now What? The Importance of Self-Care in Adoption and Foster Care
Hi! My name is Amanda and I am dying. Anyone else? I think it is safe to say, that many of us on the adoption or foster care journey are living a life of chaos and are pretty worn out, hanging on by a mere thread. We may have begun the downward spiral of talking to garbage cans, eating fish crackers off the floor for dinner, resorting to basic tomfoolery in our spare ... Read More
The Importance of Support in Adoption and Foster Care
As many of us travel along this journey of adoption and foster care, few of us will make it without finding ourselves knee deep in the trenches. It is while in those trenches that we truly realize the importance of support in adoption and foster care. Rose Colored Glasses Daniel and I first started the adoption process quite young. He was only 19 and I ... Read More
Urgent Need! Send Help!
As Christians, we are often pulled towards the word "help." It is a deeply routed foundation in the Christian faith, and has been the backbone of many church programs. The biblical basis for this is evident, and the mandate to love our neighbors is clear. Our churches are devoted to a multitude of programs to help those in need, including single mothers, seniors, divorcees, ... Read More
The Top 10 Biggest Myths about Adoption Explained
One in three people have considered adopting, yet only 2% have actually done it. That is a HUGE discrepancy! The two main reasons people have disclosed on why they don't adopt is fear and believing myths about adoption. Today we are going to break down some of those myths, reduce some of your fears and hopefully get that 2% to increase! The Top 10 Biggest Myths About Adoption ... Read More
Is Adoption Wrong?
I am a social worker. I've also been an adoptive parent for almost 14 years and a foster parent for almost 13. Over the past several years, however, with the creation of Facebook groups in particular, I have seen a shift in the way adoption and foster care is both discussed and viewed. Adoption ethics have come to the forefront of many discussions in both positive and negative ... Read More
DNA Tests and Adoption
The latest rage to hit my social media is DNA tests. I've seen countless posts and comments on people taking DNA tests to find out more about their heritage and health information. While it is popular for all people alike, it holds a special meaning in the adoption community and was one wagon I was eager to jump on. This page contains affiliate links meaning I ... Read More
Why You Should Reward Your Child for Bad Behavior
You're standing in your kitchen washing dishes when suddenly your 10 year old child comes walking in. He asks if he can have an ice cream sandwich. Dinner is in 5 minutes so you calmly let him know not right now, but after dinner. Unfortunately, this tried and true method of delaying the "yes" doesn't work and your child begins to meltdown. I'm not talking your average ... Read More
Meeting My Child’s Mother
Several weeks ago we had a momentous event in our family. We met my son's birth mom. It was amazing, wonderful and filled with more emotions than I could have ever imagined. Rewind to almost 14 years ago when we first began our adoption journey. We were only 19 and 20 years old at the time and just babies ourselves. In our adoption training session they had originally asked ... Read More
Am I Normal?
If you have ever visited my blog before, you know I am an adoptive and foster mother to 8 children. What you might not realize is that I am also a social worker and conduct home studies for fellow parents out there looking to adopt. The other day I was finishing off a home study visit with a family when they stopped and asked, "Are we normal?" The question ... Read More
Concurrent Adoption
Daniel and I had been adoptive and foster parents for roughly 3 years before we decided to expand our family once again. Mathieu was 3, Robby was 2 and Alaina had just turned 1 years old. We didn't have any other foster placements at the time so we figured it was a good time to begin. We pondered between a regular Ministry adoption, like the one we did with Mathieu, or a ... Read More
Foster-to-Adopt – Part 2
A few days after our son Robby turned CCO in June, we got a phone call that his birth mother was pregnant again and due in January. Due to her unique circumstances the baby would be apprehended at birth and we were asked if we wanted to take the new baby. We of course said yes and went on with our lives while we waited. (I later discovered I had a fluky blue camera...hence the ... Read More
9 Must Read Books for the Adoption Process
If you have begun your adoption journey already, then I am sure you have come to realize what a daunting and overwhelming experience it truly is. I am a firm believer in doing your research and reading up on various topics as you enter new phases of life. These books are some of my personal favorites which I truly believe will be a great resource for you in your adoption ... Read More
A Day In the Life of FASD
One of the top questions I get from people considering adoption or foster care, is whether or not they think they can manage a child with FASD (Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder). ... Read More
Foster-to-Adopt – Part 1
Enter Robby. We had been fostering for a little over 3 months when we got the call for our very first newborn. We had never parented a newborn before, and despite already parenting Mathieu and a few other children through fostering, I was nervous! ... Read More
When Teenager’s Adopt – Part 2
In my previous post, When Teenager's Adopt - Part 1, we had just walked into our last home study visit. Our social worker had on a very concerned look and I was worried we had done something wrong. Instead she proceed to tell us she had a proposal for us. Jaw drop. For those of you who don't know much about the adoption process, a proposal is when social workers propose a ... Read More
When Teenager’s Adopt – Part 1
Last post I introduced you to A Teenager's Wedding; a look at our wedding day at the ripe age of 18 and 19 years old. For this post, I actually squeezed myself out of the teenager category (fewf), but my husband sure didn't (I still had my strange collection of stuffed pigs on top of my kitchen cabinets, so I suppose my exit from childhood isn't 100% conclusive)! Our first ... Read More